fear

one thing i fear the most is fear... i get scared by the very thought of being scared...
i try things.. all of what i can, without the fear of being unsuccessful or getting hurt, i m not sorry for myself when i carry the scars of those various risks i took n which went terribly wrong..instead these scars remind me not to be afraid to try anything..
however those invisible scars which caused much pain for a much longer time are deviating me from being me.. of trying the impossible.
suddenly i m scared of trying, fearful of taking the next step in the unseen future... i want to but something is holding me back... so much so that i m struggling with myself to leave the fear behind and at the same time avoiding the pain.. but how can i give up on the risks for the sole reason of not getting hurt..
i cannot stop taking chances, i have to be out there trying out everything, where is the person in me who doesnot want to leave any experience life has to offer... whats keeping me aback, restricting me, not letting me be me.. whom do i fight with ... myself ??? how??
i hate being scared and now i m scared.. n thats the worst that can happen to me...