Rat Race.

as much as i say that i want to keep away from it, the fact still remains that i m a part of this rat race, and will continue to be until i finally get a place for myself. being competitive may be enjoyable for some, but i loathe it more than anything else, and would give nything to get out of this whirlpool.
it sounds very nice when u r actually far from it, the whole idea of making something of yourself and doing good in life by being a part of this nonsense etc, but when it actually comes face to face, thr is nothing ickier.
why do i want to do something i hate doing and doing better than others, who made it a compulsion, to know where you will be in 8 months from now, and look upto those who have their entire life planned out in front of them... why would i want to do that....
i dont want to know what i will do, or even if i have to i ll find it eventually, give me time and let me find out, instead of just pushing me into something which is so clearly not for me...
is it my own head thats messing with me or should i blame the circumstances, for putting me through this torture, coz i sure as hell dont want anything to do with it, call me a coward, but i want to take the first road out, away from this madness....